The end...not quite

Finally, it's the end of the term. No more classes after this. Well...there's one more but that's for research purpose, not for exam.

This term has been a truly hectic term. Yet, there's so much more satisfaction despite the rush. I think partly it is because I am finally adapting myself back to the education environment. Calculations no longer felt impossible, theories no longer senseless. Everything starts to piece together that I am able to appreciate the learning process more.

In addition, I think I have changed. I am less lazy compared to last time. I make an effort to read before and after lectures as much as I can. Books, journals, papers...I try to read it all (I feel so bookish...goodness, what is the school doing to me???). And I also attempt to understand what I learnt and if I still can't understand, I seeked clarifications from the professors. These little meetings have been truly beneficial. Take my last monday meeting with a maths professor for example. Had I not gone to see him, I would never have figured out how to solve the complicated differential equations he set for us in the second seminar (OK, I admit I still slack but there has been tremendous improvement). After more than an hour working on the question (it was only ONE question), I managed to arrive at his answer. At that point, maths does not feel like an enemy anymore.

Had I not make a point to meet this macroeconomic lecturer of mine, I would never have gotten an interesting idea for my dissertation proposal. It's interesting to note how things will turn out sometimes. This idea makes me want to work as hard as I can to get it through. It's not going to be an easy journey. Like my professor said,"It's a challenging topic". Up till now, I have only a vague idea on what I want to do. But, I am convinced, if I work hard enough for it, something will turn out. Strange how I sometimes like to take the road away from norm eventhough I like being in the norm. Not entirely my own choice though...

The course has also made me realise how intelligent the phd students are and how hard and dedicated they are in pursuing their interest. I know it was a tough journey but now I know it takes a lot of passion and perseverence to be able to complete it. Having to face irritating students just compound that painful journey. And yet, these people seem to face it with such optimism. So too do lecturers who are sometimes bombarded by rude remarks or silly questions.

This whole program has certainly changed my outlook towards the academia world.

p/s: Not quite the end as I have not submitted my econometric project which is due tomorrow. I am just waiting to click the send button now.